Yeah so, um………I almost killed sissy’s loser boyfriend tonight.

My sissy has a piece of shit boyfriend.  He has a part time job as a fry cook, lives with his parents, smokes dope(which is fine if you can afford it, lol), and is just plain a piece of shit. 

For our little private family Christmas dinner I made my specialty, a to-die-for, broccoli casserole (yeah I can’t spell).  Any who………. you make it with cream of mushroom soup.  My little ones HATE mushrooms.  From the time they could talk they always ask me “Mom, is there mushrooms in this?”.  Being the awesome mother that I am I say “No baby, no mushrooms are in that”, so they will eat it.  Little background, sissy’s piece of shit is DEATHLY allergic to the mushroom……………..

Mom gets here first.  I am putting the casserole together for the baking of the sweet goodness.  She asks what’s in it.  I tell her, adding “Maybe sissy’s boyfriend will eat it and die”.  LOL, I SWEAR I SAID IT IN JEST!

Skip ahead to dinner time.  Little man has his plate I made him.  He says, “Mom, are there mushrooms in this?’.  Being the super, sneaky Mom that I am I say, “No pumpkin, no mushrooms in that!” .

Fast forward…..I am making my plate and I call out to sissy’s loser not to eat the casserole.  Um yeah, not so much.  He heard me tell little man there were no mushrooms so helped himself to a HUGE helping of said casserole.

FUCK!!!!!! 

HE GOT SICK.  He started puking and puffing up.  Being as he  doesn’t have valable employment he has no insurance and will NOT go to the doctor.  Sissy takes him to get Benadryl. 

I was mortified.  I felt really bad, but mom and I couldn’t help but laugh.  I am so burning in hell.  Anyone want to be my roommate there?

Blessed be, he didn’t die.  He recovered, but I bet he won’t eat at my house again. 

Falalalala,

J——-